As I was sitting in the car, trying to memorize those stupid trig formulas, I knew it was all a lost cause. How was I even here? I had literally fluked my way into finals. If I didn’t get the lowest score, I don’t know who would. Regardless, I tuned into my pump-up playlist and coped harder and harder, until we reached the "enemy" territory (according to brianzjk): NCSSM. I’d been here multiple times before, and I was excited to be back. The campus was pretty cool(it had automatic doors woah), but it just felt too college-y, and it reminded me that in three years, I’d have to commit to a college that would probably decide my future. I was a little nervous, and all that trig formula cram was certainly not helping. I had printed out the 2017 mock just for funsies, and I was planning to crush my self-esteem by doing a couple of problems. It was also 9 am, so my brain was very unalive after a long night of cow cue less homework.

At that time, I had a few goals:
Talk with wolfpack, brianzjk, and just associate with them, as well as AC(jmo winner), and RG(not royal giant, but another cracked person who was probably just as short as AC).
Meet up with IX aka quasant(who i hadn’t seen since uncg)(GO FRIEND HER BECAUSE IK SHE WILL NEVER CHECK THIS AND SHE’LL BE SO CONFUSED)
Troll peace09(smh cali smurf)
Get Top 50%(I knew this was improbable, but high hopes = high copes)
After finding my way to the same dreaded place where MATHCOUNTS States was held last year(ugh the ptsd). Looking at the same very familiar hallway that the picture which our MATHCOUNTS coach had taken a picture of and posted on her public website. Looking at the testing site, which was scarily similar to that of MATHCOUNTS States. Looking at all of the school banners and records, which I had seen so much of last time.

Before everyone started piling in(brianzjk and I(we carpooled together) were like the 5th competitors that came), I pulled out the 2017 mock and started doing a couple of problems. Satisfied that I had solved a positive number of problems, I saw the 6th-grader 3-time AIME Qualifier walk in, and I decided to stop solving and start conversing. I immediately pointed him out to MX and WFeng, and both shook their heads in defeat. Finally, the SSM kids started pouring in. It was flaming time(jk we would never do that… haha… haha… ha… oops), and I joined in on the conversation with brianzjk and wolfpack, which consisted of many topics, including Math, Science, AMO, and a lot more stuff that I have already forgotten. Looks like I have already completed ¼ goals!

Some of the SSM kids, namely Allen from DMM, was trolling my Math Coach(who just so happens to be my Calc teacher), and they were failing so hard. They were saying “wait are you the guy that *inserts SSM kid name* pretended that he knew last year?” My math coach was 100% unfazed and like did not understand nor cared, and said something along the lines of “get out of my face.”

I finally saw quasant, and I was a little nervous to approach her because I wasn’t 100% sure if it was her(she had a jacket on and I really didn’t want to approach the wrong person and say “hi how are you” and then someone else is like “who are you”), so I waited a little bit. Finally, the Enloe + Past Enloe Opps had the revelation that the little number on the bottom left-hand corner meant which Sprint round team you were on. Thus, the race to find each other’s teammates began. brianzjk found one teammate iirc, and so did all of the others. I, however, had LITERALLY FOUND NOBODY(ok but the only people I had asked were the godly people who I was already talking to). I went back to the Enloe gang where all the others were, and I asked them for their numbers. No luck. Finally, I decided that I had no other option than to ask the person who I assumed was quasant. It was a gamble, but the closer I got, the more confident I was that I found the right person. I immediately asked her, and she had the same number as me! So I sprinted back to the little gang that we had formed in front of the women’s bathroom(oh yeahh there was a conversation about how person X felt extreme joy and pleasure by conversing in front of the women’s bathroom), and I said something like “thank god I found one of my teammates.” We continued talking about L SSM and whatever before I pulled out the problems again. This time having a lot of people who could explain solutions to me whenever I got stuck, I decided it was worth a shot. While solving, I noticed out of the corner of my eye that quasant was talking to someone who I assumed was her mom, and quasant was both staring at me and pointed at me for a split second. Not entirely sure what was going on, I looked up for a brief moment to make sure I wasn’t on fire or something and then continued on with solving. Finally, the competition came.

I was going to find a seat, and I was trying my hardest to sit right next to wolfpack, which I believed was going to give me an increased number of brain cells(hey if it worked with IZ at DMM, then why wouldn’t it here?). Running over to where wolfpack was sitting, I sat down. Then wolfpack proceeded to troll me by saying “just because of that, I’m moving.” I was really sad because that would mean no more increase in brain cells, but then I realized that I was sitting right behind peace09. You know what that meant: ACCOMPLISHING GOAL #2!!! I basically asked him some really stupid questions like “should I sugar rush” and “what should I guess on all of the problems,” and he responded with “no” and “C,” respectively(dang it I should have listened to his response for Q2). Crossing off Goal #3 in my head, I was finally ¾ of the way there with my goals.

As the test began, I immediately fell victim to a large amount of trolling and depression. P7 was literally such a motivation killer, as it was really stupid and also kind of counterintuitive. After that, I never really recovered. I kept on solving the problems, but I knew it was really hopeless now. I managed to solve/guess 16 MCQs(out of 20) and responded to all FRQs(because there was no penalty for guessing on FRQs), and I came out of the contest depressed as heck. I looked at Leo, who I had talked to a lot during the Regional Qualifier, and we both shook our heads and went “yeah no fk my arml chances”(Note: Top 15 people who placed would be guaranteed a spot on NC’s ARML team). I looked at quasant, who also shook her head. I immediately looked at the person who won my regional contest, and he also looked depressed as hail. IF THE NC STATE MATH ORGANIZERS ARE LOOKING AT THIS, IN ORDER TO PREVENT MINORS FROM BECOMING DEPRESSED AGAIN, PLEASE MAKE THE PROBLEMS SO MUCH EASIER NEXT YEAR PLEASEEEE!!!

After the test came lunch aka check problems for 30 minutes and then speedrun lunch in 10. I took a doctor pepper and the lunch that I had packed from home and began checking. While checking, I was mortified. I had trolled all of the middle problems. Welp, haha looks like Goal #4 was not coming true. I finished checking and found out that I had gotten a 44. I knew that I was done. Maybe Goal #4 should have been: Don’t get last. I wasn’t even sure if getting not last was even probable now. WFeng, who had listened to my Math Coach and guessed C on all of the problems he didn’t solve literally guessed 5 questions right… So yeah I really should’ve listened to peace09. Whatever. I didn’t care anymore.

Next up came the Sprint Round. As predicted, I was with quasant, and I kinda had to call her over to our table so that she knew where to go we were discussing some problems(she didn’t write down her answers and also lost her test(oops yeah I lost my test too somehow but at least I wrote down my answers)). I didn’t want to think about it much more, so as we approached the table, I immediately recognized one of the people from ARML practice. He was pretty chill, and we started discussing our strategy. Right as we were about done, we got two new members: RA and Shlok(whose last name I actually don’t know please don’t kill me if you’re reading this). RA is literally the ultra-goat, and since I was the only person on the team who knew who he actually was, I proceeded to say “carry me” and whatever. Sprint round went horribly, due to some horrible compu mistakes that both RA and I missed. Shlok was literally 30 seconds after us, and he kept on getting mad at us after he found one mistake after the other(we had already turned in the answer before the found the mistake). Overall, team chemistry was a 0, and the score was like 1 or something. TL;DR, I didn’t win any money from the Sprint Round. However, MX did! And grishem!

After some trolling around, it was awards time. I was listening to brianzjk and QCD talk about SciOly and SciBowl iirc and some other stuffs. We walked over to the auditorium, which was thankfully a new sight. Awards came and went, and I never heard my name. However, WFeng got 20th by guessing C, QCD got 12th because he’s tough like that, MX got 17th because he’s crazy, and brianzjk got 3rd iirc because he’s literally the goat. peace09 ending up winning, because smurf. As team results came around, I was a little nervous, because we were predicted to beat SSM, but nobody was 100% sure because we couldn’t exactly remember the rankings(team scores were top 3 individual scores from each school added together). As second place got announced, it turned out to be SSM! All of the Enloe kids were ecstatic(although we kept silent), and WFeng and I dabbed each other up in celebration. There were literally 20+ SSM kids on the stage because SSM’s way of selecting who gets to go to Finals is scuffed and "illegal". I said something along the lines of “SSM only has quantity and not quality,” but I said it a little too loud, and WFeng was like “bro you cannot be talking”(then again I think he might be coping with the fact that he got waitlisted but idk). As Enloe got called, we walked up there and we were really happy. I held the certificate because nobody else on our team realized that it existed, as they only realized that the plaque existed. brianzjk got to hold the plaque, and he held it above his head as some sort of SciOly reference. We were all really happy, and we were just chilling and having a good time.

Afterward, I walked with brianzjk, wolfpack, some Enloe kids as well as some SSM kids back to the SSM dorms where the SSM kids lived. I was technically not supposed to be there, as I was neither an upperclassman nor an SSM student, but an Enloe kid told me “if anybody asks, you’re Joseph Wan(an SSM student) and you’re a junior.” Thankfully, nobody asked and I made my way up to the ping-pong room/break room without any questioning. wolfpack was pretty much just ego boosting by picking out the “guests”(aka the people who sucked because they never played ping-pong once in their life) first and clapping them(including me), and then moving on. I had to leave because my dad came, and an SSM student very graciously showed me the way over the parking lot from the dorms. Obviously, he didn’t walk with me because he needed to watch the ping-pong game and whatever, but I could literally hear the people in the ping-pong room laughing and yelling even though I was literally outside :skull: In the end, I realized that I needed a key that I didn’t have to get to the parking lot, so I was a little stuck. However, an SSM student came outside of that door at just the right time and I asked for him to hold it for me(which probably raised a lot of concerns in his head), and I was let through.

When I got outside, I saw my Math Coach(ugh I hate using that term but I really don’t know what he really is tbh), and I told him goodbye and thank you because I’m really nice. He frantically came up to me, asking if I knew where *certain Enloe person* was, because *certain Enloe person* was supposed to ride back with my Math Coach. I called brianzjk, who knew the certain person, and we found out after a while that he had actually hitched a ride home with his mom without telling my Math Coach, so my Math Coach said something like “I’m going to kill that kid the second I see him next time.”(which, for legal reasons, is a joke)

Afterward, I went to my Dads office at Duke(which is like a 5-minute drive from SSM), and I started studying cow cue less because I have an AP exam, and I figured out everything that I didn’t know, as well as reviewed some other topics that I was really rusty on(namely implicit differentiation). I also talked to quasant about summer camps, next year’s courses, the contest(she actually took a picture of Enloe holding the plaque on the stage and she sent it to me, which I obviously posted on insta with the caption: Enloe W yet again), and SSM apps. I also played a little bit of Brawl Stars and noticed that JL had made some pretty darn good progress on my account. I was really tired afterward, because I had walked half a mile to get to my dad’s office(because the Duke public transit and parking permits are stupid), and walked 1.5 miles to get back(because we’d missed the bus and had to walk all the way back). My legs were really sore, so I skipped out on swimming to catch up on some work and make this blog post.

While I was talking to quasant, we realized that we forgot to take a picture together(oops), so we’ll probably do that at DMM next year(because she’ll be math club VP and she’ll force everyone to go from Greensboro to Durham again for another contest) or ARML practice(looks like someone’s going to be driving 1.5 hours again) or State math next year, whichever one happens next.

Hope ya’ll enjoyed this non-spam April post and I’m going to hop off now because I need to wake up early tomorrow(it’s 10 pm at the time of writing and I still need to do quite a bit of stuff before going to bed). Uhh spam the comments and views to get me to 5k and also to up the views/post and comments/post ratios Also, I completed ¾ of my goals, so yayyy!!!

EDIT: I just realized that I have a piano competition in 2 days and haven't fully memorized one of my pieces oops whatever I don't care anymore