So I've lost a pitiful total of 2.5 KG this summer thus far, and it's time to put my slimming body to the test (that is, now that I'm starting to have a glimpse of the jock world, I should start reaping my well-deserved booty (pun intended) on the battle ground). For those interested in how my program works, it's basically eating only boiled vegetables, balling 2 hours a day and running 9 miles a night (still for some reason, ineffective). Anyways, today, before watching
a romance movie,which soaked up every drop of liquid in my eyeballs, but, story for another day..."
I decided to flirt with a few cashiers at the food court (mostly college girls doing summer job). Here's how it went: (Slightly exaggerated details for comical purposes but the idea is the same)
*in front of the Sichuan food （麻辣锅） corner*
MeHey 美女 (chick), I want to order.
Girl*shocked, gives a what-did-he-just-call-me look* Um, what do you want
MeHm... maybe start with this tofu right here. Also the broccoli. As well as the spinach. (fast forward a minute)
GirlDo you want any meat?
MeWell you see, girl, I've been working out hours every day this summer (poses a bit) and I've been slimming myself to receive the affection of girls
GirlUm ok... I'm assuming you're a grown up?
MeYes, I'm in college, studying at 交大 (known as the MIT of China). Someone as motivated as me really have to tone down our diet, which is why I'm on an all-veggie diet
Girl...
GirlSo... what else do you want
Me*fast forward a minute*
That's about it,
does this look like enough nutrients for an increasingly-muscular body like mine
...Probably. Do you want little, medium, or heavy spice.
Me*usually I order little, but this time...* I'll take the geometric mean of little and medium spice. *Chinese girls like knowledgable, smart guys*
GirlWhat
MeOh, I almost forgot to say, I'm a budding mathematician outside of my fitness goals. I attained good scores on math contests this year. But yea, I guess I'll have medium spice, because, you know I love spice as much as spicy girls.
...Please swipe your food court card here
Girl...Sir, it's out of balance
*This was the low point of the encounter*
MeOh, um, wait, um, I... don't have money.
Girl*Gives a wow-what-terrible-boyfriend-material-look*
Me*Ponders whether I should call dad to help me pay, but decides it's too non-masculine*
MeAh, my bad. I almost let myself get ahead of my strictly-enforced diet. I purposely put little money in this card to make sure I maintain shape. You know, a man's gotta do what he's gotta do.
Girl...You still need to pay
Me...Ok then I'll cut out this tofu
GirlThanks
Me*tries to think of a joke as the finale*
GirlI'll take that, *swipe*, good day
I don't really get why she displayed such little enthusiasm, though. Am I doing something wrong? Still, I think that was a hoot and a half.
This post has been edited 3 times. Last edited by shiningsunnyday, Jul 1, 2016, 4:32 PM
by shiningsunnyday, Jul 1, 2016, 4:19 PM 
May 2018
April 2018