Hammering in the last nail of my grandma's coffin at the funeral yesterday was a slap-in-the-face reality check. After rushing to the hospital 3 days ago to see my grandma motionless and pale with my dad and aunts crying, the weight of the situation took a long time to get to me. Initially, I felt I stepped into a Shakespearean play; the scene is nothing more than part of a set up play and that, after a few days when school starts, my grandma would once again escort me out the door every morning, eat dinner with my dad and I at night, and tell me to sleep early as I head to my bedroom having hidden a red bull in my pocket.

Junior year second semester starts on Wednesday.

That fiercely hard-working, stubborn and cocky freshman year self gone; so had the depressed, me-against-the-world misfit sophomore me. As of now, I feel that I'm now the maturest and most appreciative I've ever been. The loss of my grandma has made me rethink a lot of the things I take for granted in this world - from necessities to family to education. The experiences I've gone through and am going through all serve to improve myself and help me extract my potential. They've made me strive to see the silver linings in the most exhaustive times and to observe the positive and negative situations of my life, and irregardless learn from each experience. There exists no such thing as stress or pressure - these are all states of minds that your body serves to prepare you to embrace new challenges and develop yourself. How you make use of them, however, is entirely up to you.

For some people, it's perfectively fine of them to decide to stay on the comfort lane and travel the same roads others have, as then they avoid the prejudices of others and "fit in." However, I've learned to not ignore the fact that at all times in history there has existed a vanguard who're constantly going off roads, failing to clear a new road, failing, then trying again. This the kind of person my grandma was throughout her life as a distinguished teacher, principal, and mother, and it's similar to who I desire to become. As opposed to flouting school rules and attempting to bolster my own reputation by degrading others, now I respect the conventions set by my authorities. I've learned to respect the flaws and imperfections of school and society while still maintaining constant optimism, so that when the opportunity comes, to set my own mark on unchartered grounds.

All in all, the next 5 months will be extremely exciting. Let's get the party started.